Crosswind, not
California. Metal
vessel hurtling up
mountain.
A screen tells me
my elder died—
my father’s voice
repeats it.
I drive over
land and wish
for folding road,
a direct path to hold
her frail and
breathing.
This road turns
in circuitous cuts
through stone,
through trees.
*
Crosswind: like
volta.
Crosswind: like the force
that steers a spiral.
*
The song here is the sound of branches at the tops of trees
colliding into each other, ricocheting, leafless chimes.
*
Spirals—which way to turn—represent the fragility in an open space.
– Louise Bourgeois
*
Don’t look left / the steep
slope cutting
Don’t look / yet I wonder
what is left?
*
I’m in a car but I’m trying
to talk about the cemetery.
I’m in a car but I’m trying
to talk about the calves—
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOtoo pure—
climbing to the right of this bridge.
*
I’m in a car but I’m trying
to talk about sunlight, the way
her eyes creased
to behold it.
Now, the fur of calves
like mirrors to the sun.
*
Crosswind:
to learn of death.
But I’m trying to talk
about a land of quartz.
*
Crosswind, you steer the car.
My gaze is straight. My mind
a blank / I yearn
OOOO(for what?)
: thickening green / a song
to turn the landscape
into quartz,
song for crystalline slopes
instead of stone bone-hued.
*
Crosswind, you cut through
dreams of afterlife.
Here, in lack, I yearn
for mirrors reflecting rock
until everything
can be seen through,
sung through,
against this sky
thinning out
(thinning out)
to welcome the dead.
AM Ringwalt is a writer and musician. The author of The Wheel (Spuyten Duyvil, 2021), her work appears in Jacket2, Washington Square Review and Bennington Review. Waiting Song is her most recent record. @amringwalt